[insert "idiot savant" joke here]

Yes, it's Marilyn vos Savant, whose column in Parade Magazine demonstrates on a weekly basis that unusual facility with word puzzles does not actually correlate to being particularly bright. Today, we see the following exchange:

I don't become friends with anyone who uses vulgar language in everyday conversation. I have enough friends, but I've rejected some interesting people because of their use of obscenities. Do you think I'm being reasonable?
-Nick, Baltimore, Maryland

Yes. When I read your letter, I thought about my own friends. Although I have never consciously decided against anyone for this reason, I notice that none of my friends uses bad language! I guess I've never found an interesting person with a foul mouth. So I don't think you're missing much if anything.

Okay. Firstly, Marilyn, I hate to break it to you, but the people you hover around at your mensa meeting buffets are not strictly speaking "friends." And secondly, on behalf of Émile Zola, Louis-Ferdinand Céline, Charles Bukowski, Allen Ginsberg, William Burroughs, Hunter S. Thompson, and any number of other soporifically boring people with "foul mouths," let me just extend to you and to "Nick, Baltimore, Maryland" a hearty invitation to go fuck yourselves.